Busy Being Tara

ICE is in town, and the past couple of days have been incredibly unsettling. The last update I heard was that around 80 people have been taken. I’ll be donating to the food drive being organized tomorrow to help support those who are too afraid to leave their homes right now.

Work is closed today for the Fourth of July, so I officially have the next 10 days off! I don’t really have any plans for today since the Fourth has never been a holiday I’m super into. We were supposed to have a backyard movie night with the club, but unfortunately those plans fell through.

On Wednesday, I’ll be driving to Washington for Meghan’s wedding. I’ll be staying with my parents while I’m there, and I’m hoping to catch up with a few friends before I head back home next Sunday. It should be a nice little break, and I’m looking forward to seeing everyone.

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about what the next chapter of my life looks like.

A while back, I let my boss know that I was considering going down to part-time so I could focus on school full-time. Since then, I’ve realized that, with everything I’ve been working through with my mental health, taking on a full-time graduate program may not be the healthiest choice right now. That realization has been difficult because I want so badly to keep moving forward, but I’m also learning that moving forward doesn’t always mean pushing myself to the limit.

Even though I may not go to school full-time, I still feel like I need to reduce my workload, or maybe even take a break from traditional full-time work for a while.

One thing that has brought me a lot of excitement is getting back into photography. I’ve missed it more than I realized. The thought of eventually turning it into my full-time career is something I keep coming back to. At the same time, I know businesses aren’t built overnight, and I want to be realistic about what that journey will look like.

Then there’s the practical side of things: health insurance. Leaving a full-time job means potentially paying $500–600 a month for insurance on my own, and that’s not a small expense. Because of that, I’ve been wondering if the best path might be finding a part-time position that still offers benefits while I continue school and slowly rebuild my photography business.

I wish the right answer felt obvious, but it doesn’t. My mind has been spinning with different possibilities, and it’s honestly been stressful trying to figure out what comes next. At the same time, I know this season is teaching me something important. Recovery isn’t just about feeling better, it’s about creating a life that’s sustainable, one that supports both my mental health and the dreams I’m working toward.