Busy Being Tara

A little bit of life, a little bit of adventure.

Ketamine Treatment: Day 3 (June 8)

Today was my third ketamine treatment, and honestly, I did not enjoy it very much. Unlike my previous sessions, I had a hard time relaxing and settling into the experience. My mind felt restless, and no matter what I tried, I couldn’t seem to get comfortable or fully immerse myself in the treatment.

I experimented with a few different things to see if I could improve the experience. I changed my position in the recliner and adjusted the angle several times, hoping to find a more comfortable spot. I also relied on music, which had been helpful during earlier treatments, but this time it didn’t seem to make much of a difference. Instead of feeling calm and connected to the experience, I felt distracted and unable to let go.

The treatment itself felt much less effective than my previous sessions. I didn’t notice the same emotional shift or sense of relief that I had experienced before. Whether that was due to my inability to relax, my mindset going into the session, or simply the natural variability of treatment, I’m not sure.

Even though today’s session felt disappointing, I’m trying to remind myself that progress isn’t always linear. Some treatments may feel more impactful than others, and one difficult day doesn’t necessarily mean the treatment isn’t working overall. For now, I’m going to continue following the treatment plan and see how things develop over the coming weeks.

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4 responses to “Ketamine Treatment: Day 3 (June 8)”

  1. Hilary Tan Avatar
    Hilary Tan

    Sorry to hear that this ketamine treatment was less effective this time. It’s not unheard of to have less profound trips. Sometimes, I get this with psychedelic trips. Some trips are so intense and profound while others are less impactful. Today, I’ll be taking a mushroom trip and am currently steeping tea while I write this. It’s a bit of a ceremony/ritual for me at this point. Despite taking this strain of mushroom multiple times, I’m still nervous because it’s my highest dose yet. Idk what to expect but like to push boundaries. Going into this nervous yet excited for what’s in store for me.

    My word every time is “surrender.” Next time you go on a ketamine trip, maybe try surrendering to it and letting it show you what it’s going to show you… if that makes sense.

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    1. Tara Avatar
      Tara

      Thank you for this. I think that’s exactly what I struggled with this time, I spent so much of the session trying to relax and make something happen that I may have been resisting the experience without realizing it. “Surrender” is a good word, and I’ll keep that in mind for my next treatment. I’m still very new to ketamine therapy and learning how to approach it, so I appreciate hearing about your experiences. I hope your journey today is meaningful and gives you exactly what you need.

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      1. Hilary Tan Avatar
        Hilary Tan

        Trust me, I’ve been there. Whenever I try to “control” the outcome it doesn’t turn out the way I thought it would. With magic mushrooms, it does its own thing – it’s going to show me what I need to see. Sometimes it’s physiological like drinking more water, more sunshine, more sleep. Like the time I took it with severe seasonal depressive disorder (SAD) and couldn’t figure out why I was so depressed and in the dumps. Other times is psychological like shadow work stuff. We often think that we’re going into treatment to work on our inner demons, but most of the time we end up learning things we already knew, but just needed to see it in a different light.

        With shrooms, it brings me back to childhood when I was 3-5 years old. It strips me of my ego and presents everything in this childlike, dream-like state. The visuals are incredible! Having an altered state of consciousness is honestly so cool, and I enjoy exploring it from this perspective. I’ve never taken ketamine but I’ve heard good things about it!

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      2. Hilary Tan Avatar
        Hilary Tan

        Seasonal affective disorder (SAD)

        My bad! Silly typo. 😅

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