Busy Being Tara

Today’s treatment was a much better experience than my last session. Going into it, I felt more prepared and was able to relax more easily. One thing that made a noticeable difference was listening to my ketamine playlist. The music helped me settle into the experience and let my mind drift without feeling like I needed to force anything to happen.

Unlike previous sessions, there weren’t any major thoughts, memories, or emotions that surfaced. Instead, I found myself visualizing gentle ocean waves moving in rhythm with the music. The experience felt calm, peaceful, and much more comfortable than Day 3. Rather than feeling restless or frustrated, I was able to simply be present and let the treatment unfold naturally.

As the session continued, I remained in that dreamlike state, floating between awareness and relaxation. Nothing particularly profound stood out, but the overall experience felt smoother and more therapeutic. Sometimes it seems like the goal isn’t to have a breakthrough every session, but rather to allow my brain the opportunity to rest and heal.

By the time the two-hour observation period was over, I felt like I had returned to my normal self. I didn’t experience the lingering discomfort or inability to relax that I felt during my previous treatment. Overall, Day 4 left me feeling encouraged and hopeful as I continue this journey, reminding me that each treatment can be very different from the last.